He's Quiet Perfect.

God gave me you.

God gave me you for the ups and downs
God gave me you for the days of doubt
And for when I think I lost my way
There are no words here left to say, it's true
God gave me you

On my own I'm only
Half of what I could be
I can't do without you
We are stitched together
And what love has tethered
I pray we never undo

Josh has changed my life in so many ways, and he helps me so much. I know there is a reason why he is in my life right now. I know right now I need him. I just pray one day I can return the favor, and be there for him when he really needs someone.

Life is good.

Live for the moments when life just feels so good, and so right. Those are the moments that you can rely on when things aren't going so well.

Sisters.

It's incredible that one can form a bond with someone that's so tight, they become like family to you. I think that's a really good thing to be able to do. So if your family can't be there for you, you'll have someone that will. Friends can be like an extension of your family. I've had lots of friends that were like my sisters. They are great relationships. I have to say the person that is most like a sister to me though is my lovely Elizabeth. We formed our relationship over the summer. We became so close. We shared joys and tears, happy moments and sad ones. Now that that bond has form it will take a lot to break it. We might not see each other that much now that school has started, but we both know if we ever need each other, that we will be there for each other. She's my sister. I love her.

Happy yet sad.

So I was hanging up christmas ornaments with my family, when I ran across one that said: "World's Best Cat". I realized then that this is my first christmas without Sabrina. I also then realized this is my first christmas with Josh. So least I have something to balance out what's missing.

But.

A lot of guys well I shouldn't just say guys. A lot of people I feel especially teenagers have the mindset I love you, but (Insert undesirable trait here). Shouldn't you realize if you love someone that everyone has imperfections, that no one is perfect. Shouldn't be it be: (Insert undesirable trait here), but I love you.

Awkward moment of the day!

That awkward moment when Josh and I are sitting in the car, and he goes to put his arm around me, but instead ends up smacking me in the forehead with his elbow. So smooth I know.

He came over to the dark side!

Josh got a blog!
http://apersonalrambling.blogspot.com/

You're not an almost lover.

I was listening to the song almost lover, and there is a line that says:
I never wanna see you unhappy I thought you'd want the same for me.
It made me think of the guys of my past.
Zac: We never dated but we were in love. In the middle of it he told me a girl had gotten him to say things he shouldn't have. After that he told me he didn't love me as much anymore. We fought about him giving me more time. I was something that came last or close to it a lot in his life.
Jake: Told me he loved me. We had a thing. He had a thing with at least 5 other girls at the same time.
Bennett: He told me he liked me. We hooked up twice. He almost never talked to me.
Isaac: We actually dated. He was manipulative and would at times make me feel bad about myself, and was pushy. He constantly tried to get me to go farther than I wanted to.
Looking back on all that isn't really painful anymore because of what I have now. These more or less highlight the bad parts of my "dealings" with each guy, but even when these guys treated me the best they ever did, it doesn't hold a candle to how Josh treats me. I'm not just saying all this because of my feelings for Josh. Even my parents, and sisters notice. He would never want to see me unhappy. Let alone cause me unhappiness. It's nice to not have an almost lover for once. Thank you.

First time actually ROTFL.

So I'm sitting there on the floor doing something on my laptop when I get a call from Josh. I'm really confused because we were just about to skype so I don't know why he's calling. He says "Can I ask you a question?" and I'm like "sure...." and then I swear there was a pause and I'm like thinking he is going to ask me something really serious. He says "how much detergent do you put in the washing machine...?" I almost died. I literally fell over and started ROTFL. Literally.

The meaning of true love.

"My heart pounds so hard that, despite the roaring of the crowd, I am aware of blood whoosing through my ears. I am filled to overflowing bursting love"

"I stare at her for a long moment. I want to kiss her. I want to kiss her more than I've ever wanted anything in my life"

"and one detail I can neither fathom nor shake, the one that haunts me into sleep: the feel of her fingertips tracing the outline of my face."

True love can be described as a lot of things to a lot of different people. But to me true love is this. These quotes are from Water for Elephants. For people who haven't read it, the main character falls in love with a girl who is with someone else, but doesn't give up because he knows he has found something special. He doesn't push, he lets her figure it out on her own. That is my definition of true love. Loving or caring about someone so much that you are willing to wait and watch them be with someone else because you know you have found something special and so you aren't going to let go, but you don't push. You let them figure out what they want on their own time. It's the most romantic gesture I think there is. It shows he knows what he wants, and that's you. And he's willing to wait. That's my definition of true love.

To My Dear Principessa.

So I know it was forever ago that I post this one, but I know I made a post that explained everything going on with my deary kitty Sabrina (her nickname was principessa). Well sadly enough she passed away. I miss her dearly, and even though it's been a while I wanted to write something in her memory. She meant the world to me. I had her since I was five, so I have very few memories were I don't have her. I wish I could still say that. She was my best friend. A lot of people think that cats are stuck up and not loyal and loving but she was. She would come up and sleep on my bed every night right beside me. She would sit next to me while I did my homework. When I was sick she would stay by my side. She was a very calm kitty, not mean at all. Since I had her since I was five, we grew up together. We went through everything together. She was always there for me, even though I know she hated it when I cried because I always got her fur all wet. She was the best kitty anyone could ever ask for. I only wish I could have been there with her, her last week. She took care of me so much I wish that I could have taken care of her in her final days. I miss her so much. So here's to most loyal and loving kitty. Sabrina, my principessa.

Stay Stay Stay.

So I love Taylor Swift's new song Stay Stay Stay and so I was like hey Josh you should listen to it. So he did and he was umm I'm pretty such we didn't almost break up last night, you didn't throw your phone at me, and I didn't come in wearing a football helmet. I tell him to be quite and just listen, and it's not about us, I just like it. Which is mostly true....there are few parts however that remind me of him and that's why I like it :)

Before you I only dated self indulgent takers who took all of their problems out on me
But you carry my groceries and now i'm always laughing
And I love you because you have given me no choice but to

Stay stay stay I've been loving you for quite some time time timeYou think that it's funny when i'm mad mad madBut I think that it's best if we both stay

That verse and the chorus just make me smile non stop when I hear them because they make me think of him, and how great he is. He's my prince charming. 

P.S. 100TH POST! :)

And life goes on.

No one really likes change, well I guess there are some people. I'm not one of them. I hate change. But sadly it's just a part of life. Pretty big change just happened in my life. My best friend just replaced me. I'm bitter about it but we didn't have the best relationship any, she changed too much. Maybe I did too. Anyway I guess she decided it wasn't going to work anymore. So now two girls that once talked about being best friends forever and being in each other's wedding and our kids growing up together and how fun that would be; girls who went through breaks ups, deaths, disappointments, birthdays, and joys together now don't even say hi when we pass each other in the hall way. A friendship is left in the dirt, and life goes on.

Super Weekend!

So this weekend is going to be amazing! (Which is nice since I'm going to die next week between all my midterms and test that I have to make up). So my amazing weekend starts off with me going to Miss. Jenna's house (who is a mutual friend of Josh and I, and lives down the street from him). I'll be there from around 3:30ish till like 9. I haven't seen Jenna in forever so its's gonna be awesome :) Then around 9 my friend Lucy's mom will pick me up from Jenna's and take me to their house (Lucy also lives close to Josh, and he knows her). Lucy and I are then going to have an amazing sleepover because whenever Lucy and I get together it's like a freakin party! Then I'll hopefully spend a good part of the day with Josh on Saturday. I will see Josh Saturday I just don't know for how much of the day I'll be with him. Then I'll have amazing sleepover with Lucy round two! Then church (Lucy and I are in the same ward for all you other Mormons which means we go to the same church for all you non-Mormons) which is always good. Then later that night Lucy and I are going to a church party (which I know doesn't sound fun but it is, and there's going to be amazing food), and then I go home. It's going to be totally wicked! (yes I did just say that :)  I can't wait!

Enchanted.

So I have this playlist on my itunes account entitled Love. It currently has all the songs that make me think of Josh. Well I had this play list before him, it just had songs that where about love and happy type songs, stuff like that. Well after I broke up with my last boyfriend I kinda cleared it because I didn't want to listen to those kind of songs, but for whatever reason I didn't get rid of two of the songs. One of them was Enchanted by Taylor Swift. So when I started putting songs back on that playlist, I just kept it there, even though whenever it came on I just skipped it. Well eventually I actually let play and while I have listened to the song obviously before I soon realized that that song actually kinda describes me and Josh a little and when we first met. Just a tiny bit, but enough for me to think: Well hey, that's ironic.